Funnies

I always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love. And now that you've come into my life...
I've changed my mind.

I must admit, you brought religion into my life...
I never believed in Hell until I met you.

As the days go by, I think how lucky I am....
That you're not here to ruin it for me .

Happy Birthday! You look great for your age....
Almost lifelike!

When we were together, you said you'd die for me...
Now we've broken up, I think it's time to keep your promise.

You are such a good friend. If we were on a sinking ship and there was only one life jacket...
I'd miss you terribly and think of you often .

Looking back over the years that we have been together, I can't help but wonder.....
What the hell was I thinking

I'm so miserable without you...
It's almost like you're still here.

Thank you for being part of my life.....
I never knew what evil was until I met you!

How can I say this....
Your cooking kills me

I just want you to know that I'm sorry for what happened...
Especially since you survived.

Congrats on getting married...
It's not everyday you decide to ruin your life.

Someday I hope to marry...
Someone other than you.

We have been friends for a very long time...
What do you say we stop?